The American Kidney Fund

It's my amazing Momma's birthday this weekend and she launched a fundraiser for the American Kidney Fund.

For most of us, it's important to know how our donations get spent, so I want you to know the Fund is a leader in terms of percentage of donated dollars being used on the mission rather than the overhead costs of running an organization. With AKF, the program percentage is 97%. Meaning if a person donated $100, $97 of it goes to parents like mine who needed help getting proper healthcare for their daughter, or maybe to a person who is waiting on the seemingly endless kidney transplant waiting list.

Your dollars do have direct impact when you donate to the American Kidney Fund. Please consider contributing today.

An Hour with Laughter

Living Without Susan

I feel like my heart is broken - or maybe like a piece of me is missing. This whole Living Without Susan thing is going to take some getting used to for me - I imagine for all of us.

Honestly, I could come here and tell all of you all about Susan, the adventures we shared, the memories I have, the love she held in her heart for each of us. But we all know Susan - that’s why we are all so sad.

So, I’m going to talk about me instead. I’m going to tell you all how profoundly lucky I am. And how honored I am to have spent 34 years living in Susan’s light. I learned so much from her. I learned courage and tenacity from Susan. And I learned unwavering dedication, loyalty, and strength from her as well. I benefited so greatly from her presence.

It’s hard for me to comprehend that I can’t do that anymore - that I can’t just bask in her radiant light anytime I want. I think there’s still a protective layer of disbelief in my brain - and maybe that’s self-preservation, I don’t know. But I’m honestly waiting for it to slip. That’s not going to be a good day for anybody, I know that.

It’s hard for me to imagine life without my sister. It’s even harder for me to imagine life without Dominic’s Tee-Tee. I can’t talk much about that duo though because I wouldn’t be able to speak through the tears. But you all know how he was the apple of her eye and she is the apple of his.

All I know right now is that life is darker without Susan. And the best I can come up with to compensate for that darkness is to let in as much light as possible by celebrating her life and legacy as much and as often as I can.

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I wrote a version of that to say at Susan's service, but the lump in my throat persevered. And I think it's better here anyway. At least that's what I'm telling myself.

I know many of my friends (and their friends) have already shared the fundraiser for my parents. I am awestruck at the outpouring of support, to be honest. The emotional and financial traumas of handling the funeral and burial arrangements and payments while grieving have been indescribable. I cannot stress enough how strongly I feel about making my own arrangements now, while I can, to save my loved ones the excruciating task of doing it for me while picking up the pieces of their broken hearts.